Me, “I can’t believe I get to have a granddaughter that loves the same things I do!  She is happy to drive around the countryside taking photos, come home and bake, or wander around the Asian Super Market for hours.”

Husband dryly, “Yeah, the Chinese are right.  Insanity runs in families.”

Ever think about who is following you?  I don’t just mean on social media.  I mean following behind you on the journey of life.

Husband tells me that when his brother was little, he loved his grandfather so much that he would literally walk in his grandfather’s footprints in the loose dirt.  One of his grandfather’s feet turned out as a result of a bad accident.  Brother would make one of his feet turn out so he could match his grandfather’s footsteps exactly!

“I urge you to imitate me. . . remind you of my way of life in Christ Jesus, which agrees with what I teach everywhere in every church.”  Paul (I Corinthians 4:16, 17)

Recently I’ve heard a number of adult friends and acquaintances mention that they learned this or that from their grandparent.  Sometimes it’s a small thing like an affinity for pickled pigs feet like Grandpa.  Other times it’s a lifestyle habit such as reading the Bible every day like Grandma.  I don’t imagine those grandparents talked a lot about what they ate or read.  I think it’s just that they did those things consistently and obviously enjoyed them.  It’s unlikely anyone would want to imitate someone who does something begrudgingly.  Yes, we admire someone who does their duty in spite of circumstances or personal preferences.  But we’d only imitate them if we saw that doing that duty gave them satisfaction in the end.  So I’m beginning to realize that talking about good morals or good nutrition just isn’t as convincing as living good morals and good nutrition and exemplifying the happy results of that kind of living.

“you certainly know what I teach, and how I live, and what my purpose in life is. You know my faith, my patience, my love, and my endurance.”  Paul  (2Timothy 3:10)

Our children are all grown and have families of their own.  Which is why I’m writing about this.  I’ve been thinking about how grandchildren are influenced by their grandparents.  It’s a heavy responsibility to have young ones following in your footsteps.

“Join together in following my example, brothers and sisters, and just as you have us as a model, keep your eyes on those who live as we do.”  Paul (Philippians 3:17)

Here are some thoughts regarding grandchildren (or children, if you’re a younger mom):

It’s ok to fail.

I want our house to be a safe zone where children can try to do things and know that if their results are less than stellar, no one will ridicule them.  I try to be transparent about my own failures.  I will mention that I over baked the brownies that granddaughter worked so hard to mix up before she left our house.  I’ll tell her that next time I’ll set the timer for 10 minutes less than the recipe says instead of 5 minutes.  Acknowledging a goof and always saying how I’ll avoid that mistake next time shows younger ones that making mistakes isn’t fatal.  A favorite quote of  John Maxwell comes to mind, “Sometimes you win, sometimes you learn.”  I try not to castigate myself for my failures in front of my grandchildren.  I admit them, then use them as a learning experience.  I strive to demonstrate that our grandchildren are precious to us whether or not they accomplish things.  I like this quote from an online mentor, Jenika McDavitt.

“Interestingly, exploration becomes easier when you don’t tie it to your worth. Because then, no matter how your new adventures go, you know your worth is unchanged. You’re free to fail without feeling like a failure. And that’s when exciting things start to happen.”  Irrestible You online course

I want our grandkids to know that they are loved even when they bomb their recital or get a bad grade in math.  We want them to succeed, but success is fleeting and deceptive and what’s more important is faith, hope, and love.  And the greatest of these is love.  Being truly loved and giving love is far more important than momentary victories.  Applause is nice, but lasting relationships are better.  I hope they observe Husband and I cherishing the relationship we have with each other, with our family, and with our friends.  I hope they see that giving our time and effort to others is worth it many times over.  I hope they see that coming alongside others is what we’re made to do and where we find fulfillment.  I hope they choose to practice real love.

“If I could speak all the languages of earth and of angels, but didn’t love others, I would only be a noisy gong.

If I possessed all knowledge, but didn’t love others, I would be nothing.

Three things will last forever—faith, hope, and love—and the greatest of these is love.”   1 Corinthians 13:1,2,13

I want to be the best version of myself so my grandchildren have a good example.

I hope my teenage granddaughter can see me pushing myself to move forward- stumbling, yes.  But stumbling forward.  I have been watching online tutorials to improve my PhotoShop skills.  So I was emboldened to try a somewhat involved operation in PhotoShop yesterday. Our teen granddaughter and her little sister watched, anxious to see the outcome of a photo project we were working on together.  The little one was the model and the art director, the older one was the assistant, and my job was to combine a couple of images and make a never-before-attempted project work.  What a disaster.  They had done their jobs perfectly.  I, however, fumbled my part.  They both finally wandered off in search of something else to do besides watch Grandma blunder at the computer.  I just kept at it until it finally ‘gelled’.  Much later, with the finished product on the screen, I invited them to come see.  We all breathed a sigh of relief and relished a successful outcome.  I hope they noticed that I admitted that my skills were lacking.  I hope they saw that I stuck with it through the frustration and just kept plugging away.  I hope they saw that worthwhile things often times aren’t easy; that perseverance is usually more important than ability.  I hope they saw that failing isn’t fatal.  I hope they saw that practice and patience pay off.  I hope they saw that we’re never too old to learn and that we are all a work in progress.  I hope they saw that we each have different gifts and together we can accomplish beautiful things.  I hope they saw me stumble and get up and try again because I’m not satisfied with staying where I am.

“Not that have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me.  I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead,  I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.”  Philippians 3:12-14

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